Feet First Date

My brother, Kenny, just told me that he’s feeling anxious about a date tomorrow night. Given that he comes across as an ideal package of funny, smart, handsome and all the rest, I was surprised to hear this. Somewhat unkindly, I had to laugh when he told me that the main source of his stress is an unidentified infection in his toenails.

Turns out perfect Kenny is just like the rest of us – not that the rest of us are harbouring fungal infections in our shoes or anything (at least, not all of us are). I just mean that nobody’s perfect. This is precisely why I don’t think he should get too hung up on it. Having said that, it sounds like he could do with a trip to the podiatrist.

Kenny told me he’s never been to a foot specialist before. “Feet just look after themselves, don’t they?” he said. Well, sure they do – as much as any other part of the body. That doesn’t mean stuff never goes wrong, though. I’m no expert, obviously, so we ended up on Kenny’s phone looking up options for dealing with common foot conditions. Cheltenham readers, do you have any suggestions?

Let me advise, by the way, that image searching medical issues is never a good idea. This pearl of wisdom holds true when it comes to the feet, and that’s all I have to say about that… other than that I didn’t know there were so many types of toenail fungus, foot ulcers and so on in existence.

It was good in a way, though, to look at some worst-case scenarios, because it confirmed that whatever Kenny has going on is relatively minor. It seems like nothing that can’t be sorted out by checking in with a podiatry clinic. Melbourne daters planning to meet up with a guy called Kenny tomorrow – fear not. This foot problem will be cleared up in no time, I’m sure of it.

Just be nice to him about it. He’s just as insecure as everyone else.